The Santa question start give the axe at you before your minor wrench five . How does he speed around the world in a single night ? How does he know what I need ? Sure , you could refuse Santa ’s being , but be quick for some tears .
The estimable news is , there are utterly fairish answers to the many question relating to his yearly missionary post . The bad news : The skill involved is typically beyond the mental reach of the average six year old . Most graduate students ca n’t understand the specifics of wormhole formation . Second - graders ? Forget it .
How does he deliver so many presents in a single night?
The unexampled movieArthur Christmasdescribes a high - tech military - dash global operation . In 1994’sMiracle on 34th Street , Santa aver he can slow time , and in Elf he ’s get a hot rod sleigh . But none of these techniques could really get St. Nick into all those live on rooms in one night .
Santa clearly uses wormholes , the burrow through blank space and metre that allow traveler to jump from one side of the cosmos to the other or — in this case , from one neighborhood to the next . But trying to give your shaver a primer on Einstein’s theory of relativity , gravitation and negative energy would be pointless . Instead , take a piece of newspaper publisher , withdraw a video of your house on one half , then a friend ’s home on the opppsite one . Trace a line from one side of the sheet to the other to represent the standard path — the route Santa would take in an airborne sleigh . Now close down the paper down the eye so the two houses are back - to - back , one on either side .
You do n’t have to get into the curvature of space - time , but you’re able to recount your kids that Santa use deep scientific knowledge to see a different map of the universe , one that contains road most people do n’t sleep with about . The Jolly Old Elf may have found a path to leap or leave out from one house to the next without having to travel along the same line you ’d employ . If they ’re still asking questions after that , pull up Time Bandits on Netflix streaming . If that does n’t satisfy , you might have a future physicist .
How does Santa do it all without being seen?
Obviously , his courtship allows him to become invisible . Again , though , explicate exactly how this works can be crafty . We see everything around us because objects and people and plants give off visible light . When he want to obliterate , however , Santa ’s courting cloaks him from view by forefend and re - route the light in the elbow room . There are such textile in research labs today , but you ’re better off show your kids a simpler example of this form of cloaking technique , such as this newadaptive camouflagesystem .
How does he know if I’ve been good or bad?
The melodic theme of someone watching your every move terrifies most adults , but kids can deal with it . They ’ve happily welcomed the creepy Elf on the Shelf , a doll that supposedly watches them all day , then returns to Santa at night to report on their behavior . ( Andhas some plansof its own . ) Forget the elf , though . A more reasonable explanation would be that Santa has a fleet of robotic flying laggard , each of which records HD video and audio recording , then relay this data point , via planet , back to the North Pole . If your minor are dubious , show themthese videosof Aerovironment Inc. ’s astonishing new hummingbird airy vehicle .
Is Santa really immortal?
Of course not . He ’s just very , very onetime . And if your little one desire to know how it is that he has lived so long , try a railroad car analogy . When a part of the family sedan break off down , we take it to the shop to have it replaced , and the auto keep running . The same hold for Santa . When one of his all-important parts , such as his egg - nog - soak liver , take replacement , his robotic sawbones replace it with an artificial , freshly - printed electronic organ . If any more questions take after , make for up thisTED talking . They ’ll either become a doctor or lessen at rest . Either way you ’re set .
How does he read so many wish lists?
Although it ’s courteous to depict the old guy sit at a desk , glasses perched on the border of his olfactory organ , study through stacks of illegible want inclination , this would take forever . Kids get a squawk out of big numbers , so it might be deserving running through some hypotheticals . If Santa were to obtain 10 million wish lists , and take a simple 20 irregular to read and choose an item from each one , the whole job would take him a petty more than six years . And that ’s without a break . or else , I ’d hint that he uses a rapid document scanner in bicycle-built-for-two with optical character recognition software . In short , his computing machine scan the notes for him .
Finally , if you ’re asked why elves have pointy ears , the answer is should be obvious . They are Vulcans .
Gregory Mone is the author ofThe Truth About Santa : Wormholes , Robots , and What Really happen on Christmas Eveand the novelFish .
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